Boston Avant-Garde 5: Bellicoso (23 page)

He cut her a stern look. “What he and I feel for each other isn’t wrong or unaccepted by anyone but your mother, little gator.”

She beamed at his use of the nickname he’d given her as a tiny tot. “Did Dee tell you about Ms. Aasen?”

“Ms. Aasen?” His heart did a double tap at the thought of Selena.

“My new teacher?” Allie’s hopeful expression made her gray eyes shine. “She’s so beautiful and so nice. I just really liked her right away, you know? I’m not even sure why.”

“I’m sure she’ll be a great teacher and an even better friend for you, kiddo, but I don’t know that she has any interest in Dee and me.” Malachi couldn’t come right out and tell his daughter they’d managed to fuck that up without even knowing how.

He was shocked when Allie scowled. “Don’t you dare give up before you’ve even tried! She’s amazing. Exactly the kind of person I wish I had as a mother.”

Guilt twisted inside him. Selena was the kind of person Malachi wished Allie had as a mom too. He just hadn’t had any say about it. “Allie, I know you and your mom aren’t on the best terms, but she’s still your mom.”

Allie’s snort didn’t sound as if it should’ve come from a petite teenaged girl.

“I know she doesn’t seem to care, but I promise you she does.” Defending Seraph was like acid on his tongue. “It’s just hard for her to show you how much she loves you. It doesn’t come easy for her.”

“I’m thirteen, not five. Don’t you think I know Mom only wants me because I’m her ticket to keeping you around?” She brushed furiously at the tears brimming in her eyes. “Admit it, Daddy, if it weren’t for me, you’d have been out of here a long time ago.”

Malachi reached for his baby girl only to have her push him away. “Listen to me, Gator. I might stay because I refuse to leave you behind, but regardless of whether or not you’d been born, I had a relationship with your mother. I wouldn’t change a minute of the last fourteen years if it meant losing you. You are worth anything and everything your mother has ever done. I’d walk through hell for you, baby girl.”

“Oh Daddy, I’m sorry.” She hiccupped back a sob and flung herself into his arms.

Malachi rocked his daughter; damning her mother to hell and back for everything she’d done over the years. It had to stop. It had to. Allie was his little girl. He had to clear a path to a good future for her, one that didn’t include a career running Triptych in the loveless footsteps of her mother.

“Where’s Dee?” Allie asked, her voice muffled against his chest.

It was on the tip of his tongue to tell her that he and Demon were on shaky ground, but he held back. The kid had been through enough. She didn’t need to be afraid the only parents she knew were floundering around on the rocks.

“Dee loves you, Daddy,” she whispered. “Almost as much as he loves me.”

“I know, Gator.” Deep down, he did know.

“You want to know something else I know?”

“What’s that?”

“Ms. Aasen would love both of you too, if you guys gave her half a chance.”

Malachi’s breath caught in his throat. He wished Allie’s innocent prediction were true. Yet Selena had left without a backward glance. “Sometimes love isn’t enough.”

“Love is always enough,” Allie said. Her face held all the confidence of youth and the arrogance of a girl who’d gotten her way far too often.

Malachi gave her a squeeze. “I’m going to have to go.”

“Ms. Aasen is moving onto my floor tomorrow, you know.”

All of Demon’s pronouncements about karma swirled in Malachi’s mind. Surely fate wouldn’t insinuate Selena so thoroughly into their lives if she wasn’t meant to be there. Still, there was no point in getting Allie’s hopes up for nothing. “Then I suppose you’d better be good, or Selena will give you the smackdown.”

His daughter’s expression grew smug. “I like the way you say her name, Daddy. Selena. It’s really pretty, hmm?”

“Very pretty.” Malachi got up and pulled Allie to her feet. “I’ll see you later, Allie-gator.”

She stretched up on tiptoes and kissed his cheek. “After a while, crocodile.”

* * * *

“Where the hell are you, Selena?” Lars sounded groggy and pissed off.

Selena wished she didn’t feel so emotionally battered. “In a cab on my way to Brookline.”

“Brookline?” Lars suddenly sounded awake. “How long until you get there?”

“I don’t know. Why does it matter? Isn’t that where you are?” She heard a sleepy voice in the background. “Do I hear a woman?”

There was a definite rustling of covers. “I went back to Mattie’s to make sure she was okay.”

“So what are you, napping?” Selena snorted. “It’s like five o’ clock, Lars.”

“It was a long night.” There was a squeaking sound as if he’d tried to cover the phone with his hand.

“Oh my God.” Selena was dumbfounded. “You totally slept with Mattie!”

“What makes you think that?”

“Ugh! Put her on, you idiot.” Selena wanted to reach into the phone and bitch slap her cousin for trying to lie about sleeping with her best friend. Not because she cared they’d done it, but because he’d intended to hide it.

“Hey, Se,” Mattie chirruped. “What’s up?”

“He better have treated you right, or I’ll string him up by his balls.” Selena’s voice was as flat as her emotional state.

Mattie’s sigh was strangely girlie. “Actually, it’s kind of nice to find a guy who can keep up. He’s been great, sweetie. Better than you sound, at any rate. You okay?”

“I will be. I just want to go home and sleep.” The cab turned up the long driveway that wound its way through the estate toward the Aasen home.

There was a blip on Mattie’s end. “Oh hey, some guy is calling Lars. I have to give his phone back.” There was a pause; then she heard Mattie’s voice in the background. “What kind of a name is Demon, and why is he calling you?”

Adrenaline shot through Selena. “Mattie? Lars?” The line clicked and went dead.

Why would Demon be calling Lars? Was he telling her cousin she’d left Triptych, or was there something else going on?

Who am I kidding? Of course there’s something else going on.

Her cousin had known far too much about Triptych to be just a casual observer. Lars obviously had some personal stake in the club’s business, but what? How could her London-raised cousin have any interest in a Boston club with illicit ties to practically every fetish group in the area?

And why does it matter to a silly piece of fluff like me?

The cab pulled up beneath the portico at the Aasens’ Brookline address and stopped. The cabbie turned around in his seat and gave her a grin. The guy was probably one of the last American-born and -bred cabbies in the Boston metro.

“How much?” Selena rooted in her little handbag, looking for cash.

“S’okay, doll, it’s taken care of. Have a nice night now.” He touched the brim of his Red Sox ball cap.

“Who took care of it?” Even as the question left her mouth, she knew the answer.

“The boss at Triptych.”

It was most likely a vague reference to something the cabbie took to mean one man and really referred to either Demon or Malachi. A pang of loss hit hard, and she reminded herself that she’d been the one to leave. Living with her decision wasn’t going to be pleasant. Selena forced a smile to thank the driver and got out of the cab.

Without waiting for the car to leave, she trudged up the front steps. Talk about walk of shame. Was there anything more embarrassing than freezing your ass off in a tiny dress while trying to keep the wicked winter wind from flipping up your skirt and showing the world you’d lost your underwear?

“Miss Selena?” The elderly butler’s bushy gray eyebrows practically leaped off his forehead when he opened the door.

She stepped into the welcome warmth of the foyer. “Hello, Mr. Hatch. I’ll just go on up to my room if you don’t mind.”

“Actually, miss—” He didn’t get his sentence out before her mother came charging through the double doors that led to the formal dining room.

“Selena!” Her mother rocked to a standstill, a look of utter horror on her face. “What in God’s name happened?”

There were any number of responses Selena could have picked, but only one that felt appropriate. “Really great sex, Mom. That’s what happened.”

She’d expected her mother to go off like a Roman candle, but Annaline Aasen didn’t even flinch. “Hatch, please have a light supper sent up to Miss Selena’s room on a tray.”

Mr. Hatch gave her mother the dip of his chin that had replaced his full bow about the time he’d had to have his double knee replacement surgery. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Thank you, Hatch.” Mom turned her attention to Selena. “Come on, young lady, let’s go upstairs and chat. You look like you could use a shower.”

Who are you, and what have you done with my mother?

Selena kept waiting for the inevitable blowup where her mother went off on a vicious rant about Selena’s irresponsible behavior, but it never came. If it were actually possible to hear her mother zipping her mouth shut, that would’ve been the only noise in the foyer.

They reached the top of the curved staircase, and Selena headed down the corridor that led to the south wing and her suite of rooms. Gray light from the icy evening filtered through the tall exterior windows. Even though the house was done in a rich palette chosen by Selena’s sister, Desiree, the chill winter seemed to wash the warmth and color out of everything it touched.

Her mother followed Selena into her bedroom and closed the door behind them. “Shall I have someone start a fire? It’s always so cold upstairs in winter.”

“No. I’m fine.” Selena set aside her beaded clutch and reached for the robe hanging just inside her en suite bathroom. The fuzzy pink chenille felt so good against her clammy skin. “You don’t have to babysit me. I’m not going anywhere tonight. I promise.”

Her mother sat in one of the pink-and-white-striped chairs positioned in front of the fireplace. “Please sit? We’re long overdue for a chat.”

Selena kicked off her heels and blissfully let her feet sink into the thick nap of the rug before settling into the other chair. She knew it was going to be impossible to avoid this conversation tonight. Besides, she was already feeling as if someone had wrung her out like a dishrag. Why not let her mother have a go?

“I know we’ve had our differences lately, darling.” Annaline folded her hands primly in her lap.

Selena noted that her mother was wearing a soft jersey sweat suit instead of her usual chic attire. Not that the black-and-white creation was anything other than designer, but it was casual for her mother’s usual tastes.

“I never wanted you to go back to Jackson. I know you and your sister both believe that I did.” Her mother held up a hand to say she wasn’t through. “I know I gave you fits about the divorce, but I was sick and tired of letting that man take advantage of an embarrassing situation he’d created to begin with. He humiliated our family, and you in particular.”

Funny, but that little dig didn’t sting anymore. The socially catastrophic wedding that had consumed her thoughts for months now seemed no more than a blip on her timeline. Meeting Demon and Malachi had utterly changed how she defined concepts like
important, pride
, and
disgrace
.

“Seth and Josh had to blackmail him, you know.” The words just popped out. Selena wasn’t sure if her mother knew exactly what had happened that night at Asylum.

“I know. Seth told me.” Her mother’s expression hardened. “I find it extremely gratifying that Jackson was brought to his knees by the one woman who turned him down flat at the reception.”

“Suri is a hard-ass.” Selena could give praise where it was due, even if it was grudgingly.

“Something happened to you that night though, darling. You’ve been running around like some frat-house groupie during rush week. It worries me.”

Selena marveled at how quickly perspectives could change. How long had it been since she’d met Malachi and Demon for the first time? How long since they had rescued her from Jackson’s wrath? How long since she’d been trapped against her will in the stocks? The woman who’d walked into Triptych that first night, and the one who had walked out a few hours ago weren’t the same. Hell, they weren’t even the same species.

“Selena, what happened?”

What
had
happened? “I think I fell in love.”

Her mother sat back in her chair and thoughtfully pursed her lips. “Falling in love isn’t the tough part, darling. It’s the staying in love that kills you.”

Coming from a woman who’d been married five times, Selena thought it was probably very true. “Did you stay in love with any of them?” she finally asked.

“Your father.” Her mother’s face grew so soft Selena could barely see the social powerhouse she’d grown up trying to emulate. “He gave me all three of you children and over twenty years of joy. Watching him die ripped my heart out, but I was never sorry for one second. I’d do it all over again if it meant I got to spend time with him.”

“How did you know he was the one?” Selena tried to reconcile the idea of her parents as young lovers. She’d only seen the couple that had dominated Boston’s social scene. “And if you know what real love feels like, why go through four total failures?”

Her mother’s eyes flashed briefly, and Selena braced for impact. Then surprisingly, the storm receded and her mother exhaled a sigh. “I told you, it’s easy to fall in love. The difference with your father was that I wanted forever with him.” She stared out the window as if recalling every second they’d had together. “After that—it’s exciting to fall in love, but I just don’t feel like putting forth the effort it takes to make things last.”

“Why not?”

“None of them will ever be your father.”

Selena thought about Malachi’s warm strength and Demon’s iron-willed self-control. They’d taken her so far down the path of self-discovery she wasn’t sure she could ever go back.

The thought brought her new employment decision to mind. “I’m going to be moving to the Boston School for the Arts tomorrow. I’ve taken a position as a student teacher.”

“Is that right?” her mother murmured.

“Are you angry?”