Reflection (Game On Trilogy #2) (5 page)

“Please say something,” he begs. “Tell me we can make this work. Please.”

However, at this point, I am too far gone. Sitting on the edge of the sofa, the palm of my hands covering my ears, I try to washout everything Derek is confessing to. With my eyes clenched shut, I force the tears to remain at bay. I rock back and forth, wishing that this nightmare would end. But, it doesn’t. He keeps talking.

He bends down in front of me, and places his hands on my shoulders. “Talk to me,” he whispers.

I lift my head and look him dead in the eyes. “Talk to you?” Rage now fuels the tone of my voice. “Talk to you?” I repeat.

“Yes.”

“We will never be.” I yell. “There will never be an
us
.” With my temper rising, I continue. “I will never marry you and I will never have kids with you.” And if he wasn’t pissed off before, my last comment certainly does it.

Derek lowers his hands to my knees and pushes off to a standing position. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” He reaches into his jeans pocket and pulls out his keys. “You know what, you don’t want me? Fine, but screw you, Chelsea. I don’t need to listen to this. You’re right. We need to end this. I’m sorry I ever thought we could be more than just a casual fuck.”

Without another glance in my direction, Derek walks out the front door.

And here I am, alone, left sitting on the couch, all by myself. The way it’s meant to be.

For the rest of my life.

Derek

I can’t believe she is throwing away something that I know can be so much more. Could she have been more brutal? Saying that there will never be an
us
and that she will never have my kids was a fucking blow to my ego. Sure, we haven’t technically been dating, but I’ve been wanting it for some time now.

Today is going to suck. I need to spend the whole evening with her at the surprise engagement party.

Most of the guys from the team will be there tonight so I’m sure I can busy myself with them, but just the thought of Chelsea being in the same room with me and not being able to touch her will fucking suck.

“Hey man, we all set?” Bob asks as he swings open the door to his Box at the stadium.

“Yeah man. Thanks for taking care of the lights and stuff.”

“No need to thank me.” He pats the palm of his hand on my back. “I’d do anything for you boys. Shane deserves some happiness in his life. I’m just glad it’s with a girl we all love.”

I look out onto the field. It’s still light out but it’ll be getting dark in a bit. “Yeah, she’s pretty cool.”

“So, when are you going to wrangle in my favorite employee, Chelsea?” He asks.

Fuck.
“Trust me, I’ve been trying.”

“Well, get to it. I need to win some of my money back playing poker and you’re my best bet.” He chuckles.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“She wins every time, but you . . .” he shakes his head, “you’re a piece of cake. I’m bound to make a killing off your bad luck.” He says, slapping my back even harder this time.

Bad luck is right.
“Whatever man.”

“Hey, I’m just joking with you. What’s up?” Shit not now.

“She doesn’t want me, man.” I say, keeping my gaze on the empty field.

“No shit?”

“Nope.”

Bob walks away and returns with two beers. He twists off the tops of both and hands me one. “Then you need to try harder. If that’s what you want.”

I look over to Bob with a confused look on my face. “Dude, I told her what I want and she blew me off, and I don’t mean with her on her knees.” I say with a straight face, but Bob takes it as a joke.

He laughs then says, “Derek, Derek, Derek.” He takes a long swig of his beer then continues. “If I walked away every time Judith told me no, then I’d still be single. Women need to feel wanted. Not smothered. Give her time. When did all this happen?” He asks.

“This morning.”

Bob laughs again. “Like I said, give her time. But don’t give up. We like her. Judith likes her. And trust me, when Judith makes a prediction, she’s usually right. She knew right from the beginning that Alli was meant for Shane. She also made the prediction about you and Chelsea.”

I look from Bob’s face to the field again thinking about what he’s saying. “You think so?”

“I know so. Besides, when I saw her a little while ago . . .”

“You saw her?” I cut him off.

“Yeah. She’s with Judith. They’re gathering the bottles of champagne from the house and checking on the caterers.”

“How did she look?” I feel like a pussy asking another man how the woman of my dreams looked.

“Like she has something on her mind. It’s clear she has something she needs to work though. I don’t know what it is, but it’s clear something is clouding that pretty little head of hers.”

“Yeah, I just wish I knew what it was.” I mumble under my breath.

Neither of us speak another word about Chelsea or anything else for that matter until we hear the click of the door.

We both turn around to see Judith and Chelsea enter the room.

“There’s my best girl.” Bob says as he makes his way to his wife.

Chelsea lowers her head and just busies herself with a crate of champagne. I quickly walk over to her. “Let me help you.”

She grips tighter to the box and doesn’t say a word.

“Please. I can tell it’s heavy. Let me help you.” Damn stubborn woman.

“I’m fine.” She turns to put the large box on the floor next to the counter. “If you want, you can grab the remaining bottles. They are on a cart in the hallway.”

I quickly walk to the hallway before she has a chance to change her mind and do it all herself. I return with one box, set it on the floor next to the other one and go back to get the last box. Once I return, I set the box down and start helping with putting them in the refrigerator to keep them cold.

My arm brushes against hers as we go back and forth putting the bottles away. I feel the warmth of her skin and I want nothing more than to brush my lips against her bare shoulder, but I refrain. Why does she have to look so damn sexy?

We both reach for the last bottle in the box and my hand lays on top of hers and neither of us move for long seconds. She pulls away all to quick, but the feeling of her doesn’t escape me. I feel a little part of me die as she retreats further away from me.

“Chelsea,” I have no idea what I plan on saying to her. But, she cuts me off all too soon anyway.

“Don’t. Not here. Not today.” She says.

“I wasn’t . . .”

“Today is Alli’s day.”

“I know that.”

“Then let’s just get through today and then we’ll talk.”

“When?” I ask. I need to know she is not going to disappear from my life.

Finally, Chelsea looks up at me for the first time since she walked into this room. I see hurt in her eyes and it makes me wonder who hurt her. It’s clear someone in her past crushed her soul so bad that she can’t open herself up to something that could be so good. “I don’t know,” she shakes her head. “I don’t know.” She repeats.

It sounds so final. I release all the air from my lungs, trying to reign in my emotions. She is still looking at me as if she is fighting something inside of her. “Are you okay?” I ask. I need to know what I am up against.

She slowly shakes her head once again. “No,” she mouths that one single word to me.

God so help me, that one word just breaks my heart. “Oh baby, please tell me what is wrong.”

All too soon, the click of the door breaks our bubble and the aroma of food glide’s between us.

Chelsea takes a step back leaving me to reach for her bare arm. I don’t want her to leave me. Not just yet.

“I’m sorry.” She says and I slowly release my grip, trailing my fingers down her soft skin until I reach her delicate fingers and then the contact is lost. Chelsea is only four feet away from me, yet it feels like hundreds of miles between us.

Once again, she busies herself with the caterers, setting up food on the counters and champagne glasses on the table. I retreat to the other end of the room with a beer in my hand and watch her. She is so beautiful. She’s wearing the most flattering pink summer dress. Although, she can be wearing sweats and a t-shirt and still look equally as gorgeous. However, the zipper that runs down the back of her dress begs for me to lower it just a little more so that I can run my fingers across the dip of her lower back. I knew today would be tough, but fuck me, I can’t seem to want anyone else but her. Her suntanned skin shimmers from the lights that shine down from the ceiling. Her hair, that glows with bursts of blonde and chestnut brown streaks, begs for me to fist it into my hands as I kiss my way down the soft flesh on her neck. Everything about this woman drives me to a place I’ve never been before.

And fuck me if it’s not the best feeling I have ever felt. I just wish she felt it too.

Chelsea

An hour has gone by since I last felt Derek’s touch on my hand. I was ready to spill everything just because I know that I am ripping his heart out. My only problem is that he is right. I do feel more for him than I am letting on and it kills me that I cannot act on my feelings. Not when I have so much buried inside of me and the promise that I made to Bryce.

I manage to busy myself with moving trays and rearranging platters from one spot to another just to keep my mind on something other than Derek’s constant stare on me. I feel his gaze on me no matter where I walk or what I do. It’s unnerving to say the least, but I have to admit that it feels good to have his eyes only on me.

This room is filled with major league baseball players and the gorgeous women that are in their lives. Any minute Alli and Shane will arrive and she has no idea any of us are here. I’d be lying if I wasn’t the tiniest bit jealous of everything she has and everything that is coming her way. 

“Okay, I just received a text from Shane. We have to turn the lights off in the room.” Bob says from where he’s standing by the door.

Suddenly, the lights go out and the room fills with nothing but the glow from the moon. It’s quiet except for the shuffling of feet as everyone tries to get a clear view of the field. No one wants to miss what Shane has in store for Alli.

Minutes go by when finally, we all see a flicker of light at the far end of the field. You can see everyone shift their heads to face the two individuals that this night is meant to be about. The light is so small and it’s clear that it’s probably the light from Shane’s cell phone. It doesn’t appear that they are actually on the field yet though. Maybe walking down a flight of steps before they finally come to a halt at the lower railing.

Another minute goes by and it is so quiet that you could hear a pin drop. As much work that Bob, Judith, Derek and I have put into this evening, Shane has kept some of the nights event a secret even from us. I am so happy for the both of them. I just wish I was in a better frame of mind to fully enjoy the night.

A glare so bright nearly blinds us all as lights flash from below. I knew Shane had something spectacular up his sleeve, but even this blows me away. All of us, for that matter.

The jumbo-tron at the opposite end of the field turns on with the glare of bright shining words, “The first part of my wish came true.” The words fade away as another set of words come into view. “Please help me make my second wish come true. WILL YOU MARRY ME?” In big bold, bright shiny letters.

Suddenly, the field lights turn on and a stage below the jumbo-tron comes into play. How had I not seen them set it up is beyond me. I’ve been in this room for nearly an hour and a half and not once did I hear people setting up a stage. I guess I was just too busy trying to block out all that is going on in my head to notice what was going on around me.

A band starts playing a song that is all too familiar. It’s James Blunt. It’s one of Alli’s favorite bands.

They’re singing, You’re Beautiful.

The loud noise of
aww’s
and
oh’s
going on in this room is unbelievable. The women are clapping and hugging one another while the men high-five and slap each other on the backs.

We can all now see Shane and Alli clear as day. Her arms are wrapped tightly around Shane’s neck. The music plays as we all see Shane pick up Alli and swing her around in a circle, her legs dangling in the air.

My eyes are glued on the beautiful sight of someone else being so happy. Suddenly, the feel of fingers run gently along my cheeks. I turn my head to see Derek standing next to me. He’s wiping away the tears I hadn’t realized were slipping down my cheeks.

Derek laces his fingers with mine and starts walking backwards. I let him pull me until we come to a full stop in the hallway. The door clicks shut and we are now left alone. Away from everyone else.

“Are you okay?” He whispers, the palm of his hands on either side of my face.

For the life of me I cannot seem to get out any words. I’m afraid that if I try to speak the dam will break and I will be a blubbering mess.

Instead, I do the next worst thing. I wrap my arms around Derek’s waist and hold on tight. I hold tighter that I’ve ever gripped anything in my entire life. Like a lifeline, I wrench my fists around the back of his shirt so tight that the collar nearly chokes him.

“Baby, talk to me. Who did this to you? Who broke your heart so bad that you’re crying such sad tears at what should be a happy moment?” He asks, but I still cannot talk. I keep my fists wound so tight that our bodies pull together so close and the heat from our bodies is felt right through the fabric of our clothes. “Shhh,” he rubs my back, pulling me even closer, if that’s possible. “Just relax. I’m sorry. We don’t need to talk right now.”

Once I manage to calm down, I loosen my grip and pull away just enough so that I can look into his eyes. “Soon. I promise.” I whisper back.

Derek smiles down at me, lifts the hem of his shirt and wipes away the remaining tears on my cheeks. God he is such a good man.

“Come on. Let’s get you cleaned up before Shane and Alli make their way up here.” Derek wraps his arm around my shoulder and leads us back into the room and straight to the private bathroom in the Box. Luckily, no one is in there. I wouldn’t be able to face anyone looking like this.

Neither of us say a word as Derek takes a paper towel, wets it and dabs my cheeks and forehead with the damp cloth. I look up at him and watch as he takes special care of me. He is so gentle. So sweet. So caring.

He reaches for another paper towel never taking his gaze off mine. He presses the dry cloth against my cheeks. Dabbing lightly. The look in his eyes is so endearing. “You are so beautiful.” He whispers.

On instinct, I lift up on my toes and lay my lips over his. His hand wraps around the back of my neck, pulling me closer to him. His mouth opens slightly. His tongue slipping out to trace the curve of my lips. He does it so gently. So sensual. So sweet. I melt right into his tall lean body. I lose my breath in his tender kiss. A moan escapes my throat and I feel his other hand snake around to my lower back pulling me in tight against him. He feels so good. Sliding his hand along my curves and caressing my behind makes me whimper. I want to be so much closer to him than this. I push into him until his back hits the wall. I slide my hands up the front of his shirt, wanting to feel more of him. Needing to feel so close, I lift the hem of his shirt until I can place my lips on his bare chest. I want him.

Derek whispers in my ear, “Chels.”

I shake my head, because talking is not what I want to do right now.

“Chelsea, honey. Look at me.”

I don’t want to look up at him. If I do it will end. I don’t what this to stop. Not yet, anyway.

All too soon, he pulls away and rests his forehead against mine. He closes his eyes and releases a long breath of air and says, “We better stop.” I nod my head even though stopping is not what I want to do right now. “They’ll be up here soon.”

“Yeah.” Is all I say. I smooth out the wrinkles I created on Derek’s shirt. However, the black spots on the lower part of his shirt is useless. “I’m sorry.” My mascara is all over it.

“Don’t be.” Derek gives me one last hug before pulling open the door.

We walk out to everyone swaying to the music by James Blunt. It really is such a wonderful night.

Moments later, the door opens and in walks Shane and Alli. She is surprised to see all of us. She immediately spots me and runs over to me. “You knew about this?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I might have known a little something about it.” I say.

Alli wraps her arms around me and hugs me tight. “So I take it you aren’t upset about not going to a play tonight?” I ask.

“Are you kidding me?” She squeals. “I am going to marry the best man I know.”

Shane walks up behind her, wrapping his arm around her waist, pulling her away from me. “Come here, you. I want those arms wrapped around me. I miss you.” He says looking into her eyes.

“I left you like fifteen seconds ago. How could you miss me already?” Alli asks as she plants a sweet kiss against his lips.

“It was long enough.” He says, making Alli giggle against him.

“I’m happy for you guys.” I say, trying to break up the two lovebirds. “Come on. We have a toast to make.”

I make my way to the table that has several dozens of already filled glasses full of champagne. The room hostess must have filled them when Derek and I were in the hall.

“Everyone.” I holler, clinking a spoon against my glass. “Everyone come grab yourself a glass and let’s toast to the happy couple.”

Everyone gathers around and we all circle Alli and Shane. As we hold our glasses high, Shane begins to speak first. “Everyone, this gorgeous woman standing next to me just agreed to marry my sorry ass.”

Everyone starts laughing and someone yells out from behind, “It’s about time, Lucky.” That voice. That sweet voice. We all turn around to see Kaitlyn standing on a chair holding a glass of champagne. Kaitlyn is Shane’s little sister.

“Hey, put that down. You’re not old enough.” He yells.

“Come on, just one sip.” She counters back.

“No!” He demands.

Shane and Kaitlyn weren’t close growing up until shortly before she became sick last year. Ever since then, Shane has been the overprotective big brother.

“You’re no fun.” She hollers, laughing as she hops off the chair.

“Maybe I’ll let you have a sip on my wedding day.” Shane says to her as he pulls his gaze back to Alli who grins a smile a mile wide.

The whole room starts cheering for the happy couple. They really do look happy.

“Let me add on to your toast.” We all look over to see Derek standing tall on a barstool. “Shane, I have known you for a long time now, buddy, and I can’t thank Alli enough for taking your sorry ass, as you put it, off my shoulders.”

Everyone laughs at his sense of humor.  Even I do. I’ve heard stories about those two causing trouble on the road. Whether it’s pranks or stories about other women.

“I am tired of putting up with your ass getting me in trouble.”

“Him? Don’t you mean the other way around?” Someone yells.

Derek glares in the man’s direction. “Anyway,” He says before continuing. “Alli, honestly, you have one hell of a guy here.” He points to Shane who has his arm around Alli. “Shane, we all love Alli, and I am sure I speak for the team when I say, we can’t be happier for the both of you. Welcome to the team, honey.”

Everyone hoots and hollers as we clink glasses with one another. Derek makes his way off the bar stool and walks over to stand beside me. He snakes his arm around my waist and pulls me against his side. He looks down at me and holds his glass out. I tap mine against his and we both tip our glasses back and take a sip.

The evening was perfect. Alli is the happiest I have ever seen her and Shane is on top of the world. He managed to talk her into going on the road with him and the team for the next week traveling from city to city.

Derek comes up next to me. “Come on, let me walk you out.” The crowd has left and it’s just us left in the room, except for the room hostess who is cleaning up our mess.

I smile up at Derek and nod my head. I purse my lips and tell him, “Thank you.”

I grab my purse and drape it over my shoulder. We exit the room and make our way down the elevator in silence. Tonight was overwhelming in more ways than one and I can’t quite grasp my feelings on any of it at the moment.

“Where are you parked?” Derek asks.

“Just around the corner here.” I point to the edge of the stadium. We walk in comfortable silence. So much has been said between us over the past twenty-four hours and yet, we can still be in each other’s company not having to say a word.

It’s still warm out, it being summer and all. There is so much more to talk about, but it’s nice to know that we can still have this time between us.

We get to my car and Derek grabs my keys from me. “Here let me open this for you.”

I smile up at him as he continues to take care of me.

“Chels, I’m sorry.” He turns to face me, putting his thumb under my chin so that I have to look up at him. “I’m sorry that I pushed you into something you’re not ready for.” I shake my head. “I’m sorry that I am not what you need at the moment.” Where is he going with this? “Maybe this week apart will do us both good.”

I am not sure why I all of a sudden feel his loss. It’s not that I don’t want him. I do. I just need to work through some issues right now. My own issues.

“Maybe you’re right. Maybe we are not made for one another.”
What? No!
“Hell, we aren’t even dating. It was wrong of me to expect more from you.” Derek gently pinches my chin between his thumb and forefinger. He slides his thumb down making my lips part. He lowers his head and kisses my mouth. He nips at my lower lip and pulls gently with his teeth, causing me to moan against his mouth.

I keep my arms by my side not liking the feeling of what feels like a goodbye from Derek. But, I can’t lead him on any longer. He’s right, maybe this week apart will be good for us. It seems we have become dependent on each other lately and me making myself a little too comfortable in Derek’s embrace is not where this can lead.