Authors: Jean Haus
Sleeping Handsome (5 page)
~9~
I practically dance into Zach’s room the
next day. “You’re not going to believe it, but I did it!” I throw my keys and they
land on the dresser with a thud. “I told Amanda off!”
At the end of his
hospital like bed, I grab the rail and swing from it. “I didn’t plan it or
anything. It just happened. She was waiting at my car after school. She wanted,
kind of demanded, we go to the coffee shop where the college guys she likes
hang out. I told her I couldn’t today or tomorrow or the next. She gave me a
weird look and asked me what my problem was. And then it just came out. Like
majorly came out. I told her being the used, bitchy sidekick didn’t interest me
anymore and I was done hanging out with her.
“After her face twisted
into pure evil, she started threatening me, telling me how she was going to
destroy me. And you know what? I had a revelation. I didn’t want to be a jerk,
but fight flames with flames, or however that goes. So I got in her face and
told her between the multitude of guys she’s done, the twenty some puke
pullovers, and the four pregnancy tests if I were her, I’d keep my mouth shut.
In fact, I’d be real nice to not just me, but everybody in school. Because the
thing I learned best from her is how to spread gossip.”
I nearly jump off the
bed like a gymnast and twirl over to the bookshelves. “Ha, you should’ve seen
her face. She about blew up.” I squat but look at him. “And you’re so right. I
feel free. And I have to thank you because you inspired me. So thank you,
Zach.”
I peruse through titles
on the shelf until the sound of a throat clearing almost has me teetering over
into the plush carpet. I use the bookshelf for support and look over my
shoulder to see Mrs. Wallace in the hallway.
“Paige, can I talk with
you for a moment?” she asks, but doesn’t step into the room.
“Ah, sure,” I say and
bounce up.
“How about down
stairs?” she asks.
I glance at Zach.
“Um…okay.”
Down the stairs, past
the living room where the nurse reads the paper on the couch, we enter the
kitchen. I’ve never been in here before. I usually just go from the front door
right up the stairs. Though much smaller than our kitchen at home, the room is
nice with warm wooden cupboards and a creamy tile on the counters. She motions
to the small island in the center and I sit on a stool. She leans on the
counter across from me and the tight expression on her face has a streak of
apprehension moving down my spine.
She takes a deep
breath. “Today’s the last day we’ll need you.”
My fingers grip the
edge of the counter. Did she find out about the journal? Is she mad I didn’t
tell her? Whatever the reason, I have to talk her out of it. “Why?”
“Because…” she says as
tears begin to well in her eyes and my apprehension turns to fear. She takes
another breath and the tears flow freely. “Because he’s coming off all of the
machines tomorrow.”
For a moment I’m as
still as Zach. Then I jump up, knocking the stool over in my fury. “You can’t
do that!”
Mrs. Wallace shakes her
head. “I’m sorry, Paige. Zach’s father and I have made our decision.”
The image of Zach lying
there without breathing and my life without him has me yelling, “No! No! No!
You’ll kill him.”
Her fingers now grip
the counter as her expression lines with anger. She takes another deep breath
and clears her face. “I understand this is hard for you. I never imagined we’d
come to such a decision, but it’s time. I’m sorry.”
“Is it about money?
I’ve got money. I could help.”
She wipes her face. “Oh
Paige, that’s so sweet. But no, it’s not about money, it’s…it’s about closure.
We have to let go.”
My mouth opens, ready
to plead more, but the pain in her shining eyes has me snapping it shut. This
is her son of almost eighteen years while I’ve only known him for a month
through a journal. But my silence twists my heart in two.
She hands me a Kleenex from a box of tissue
behind her before getting one for herself. I hadn’t even realized I was crying.
She hands me two more. “You don’t need to read today. It’s okay.”
I press the soaked
Kleenex to my lips before I whisper, “Can I at least go say goodbye?”
She shakes her head
yes. “Of course you can.”
Through the foyer and
up the stairs, my eyes become the source of a tear river. My nose a waterfall
of snot. In his room, I shut the door—something I’ve never done—and lean
against the back of it while I sob then stumble to the bed.
The feel of his warm
hand in mine turns my sobbing into overdrive. I can barely make out his serene
face through the mist in my eyes. I still can’t believe this is happening and
I’m not sure what to say, what my last words should be.
Needing to feel his
warmth, I grip his hand tighter. “I’m going to miss you Zach. So much.” I stare
at him while the air in the room feels like its weighing me down. My body
becomes on long shudder. This is it. I’ll never see him again. Never read to
him again. Never be with him again. He’s changed me so much in so little time
that I feel like I’ve known him forever. He’s shown me honesty and dignity.
Shown me to be truthful to even myself.
And now I should be
truthful to him.
My tears spill across
his skin as I push the breathing tube on an angle and lean forward. “I love
you,” I whisper in a light breath and press my lips to his. They feel soft and
warm as they press against mine.
Press
against mine.
I stumble back as if
the light press of lips burned me and sob at the desperation that has me
imagining him returning my kiss. But beneath me, his blue eyes flutter open. He
turns his head ever so slightly and blinks, like he’s trying to focus, trying
to find me.
“Zach?” I whisper as my
hand flies to my chest.
His mouth opens but
only a soft moan comes out.
“Awake!” I shout loudly
then cover my mouth only to pull it away and shout again, “Awake!” Instead of
the air pressing in on me, I’m now weightless with joy. Shock and happiness mix
until I’m a human ball of euphoria. “Awake!” I squeal again as footsteps sound
on the stairs.
Mrs. Wallace bursts in.
The nurse is right behind her.
For a long second they
both stare at him blinking and silently moving his mouth. Mrs. Wallace bursts
into tears. The nurse rushes to his side yelling, “Call the doctor!”
I step out of her way
until I’m pressed against the bookshelves. I watch the nurse check his signs
and his trembling mother push phone buttons. She shouts at the doctor on the
other end before laughing uncontrollably.
Then I just watch him
before they shove me out the door.
~10~
I think of what brought me to this
moment while I wait on the side of the stage. It’s been over three months since
they shooed me out of the room and out of Zach’s life. For whatever reason his
mother won’t answer my calls. Though she did send me a huge floral arrangement.
I still miss him every day, but knowing he’s alive helps soothe the ache. I
wonder how he’s doing, if he’s going to school, how his eighteenth birthday
went, and yes, if he’s dating someone.
I watched the news and
local paper like a hawk since that day, and was only partially surprised to
read that his friend Matt, before Zach was even awake for a full forty-eight
hours, confessed to pushing him off the cliff. Though sad for Matt, I was
ecstatic that Zach hadn’t jumped. Really only a very tiny part of me believed
he could do such a thing. However, I was hardly surprised three weeks later to
read that still recovering from coming out of a coma, Zach had pretty much
exonerated his best friend by explaining to the police it had been an accident.
They’d been pushing each other while arguing. Either of them could have fallen
off the cliff, he stated adamantly. Of course, Zach wouldn’t hold a grudge.
Even after four months in a coma.
I often imagine running
into him. At a store. In the mall. At a restaurant. Outside his house when I’m
nonchalantly walking by. (Okay, I’d be acting since there’s no reason to be in
his neighborhood.) Would he know me? On my good days, I see him running to me,
whispering those words I said to him before that fateful kiss. On bad days, he
walks by without even looking at me. Even when he ignores me in my imagination,
I still wistfully watch him go by.
It’s almost humorous
how much I miss him.
School’s alright.
Amanda has reduced herself to giving me dirty looks in the hall and that’s
about it. I just ignore her. I still see Kelly. Though she still hangs with
thee
bitch, the two of us go out for
pizza sometimes or sit on my couch stuffing our faces with popcorn and watching
romantic movies together. She’s the only person who I told about Zach. She
thinks it’s very romantic. Thinks I woke him with my kiss. I think it’s
romantic too. Except the part about how much it sucks without him.
I didn’t get that part
for the cable show, but I did get a part for the school play. Actually, I got
the lead. Practice has kept me busy along with hanging out with my mom. Yeah, I
finally got up the nerve to ask her why she basically ignores me. After looking
stunned, she started crying and mumbling about how sorry she was. She thought I
was too busy for her and claimed she missed me. I didn’t really believe it
until we started shopping together, making dinner, going to the movies, and all
that other mother and daughter stuff. Maybe I had helped build that wall, but
Zach showed me how simple communication and honesty
can
change everything.
So tonight is my big
night. Opening night. Two weekends in a row, I’ll be under the spot light.
Though the other people in the play were a bit standoffish and skeptical of me
at first, we’ve gotten along great. Okay, I did supply the pizza after practice
and maybe even take-out sushi a couple of times, but really, you can’t win
people over with just pepperoni and raw fish. You have to be nice. You have to
respect them. And the funny thing about all that is, is that you start to
respect yourself. Yeah, I learned that from Zach too.
The stage manager, a
short tyrannical junior girl who’s perfect at her job, pushes me up the side
steps. Alrighty, here I go. The curtain opens. I walk out while my heart beats
nervously. My parents and my sister are in the front row. Kelly’s even here
with her latest boyfriend. I take a deep breath and say my first line. Once
it’s out, my nerves evaporate.
For the next hour and
twenty minutes I totally enjoy myself and in the back of my mind, I’m kicking
my own ass for listening to Amanda. I could have been doing this every year.
Live and learn, I guess. The future has endless possibilities.
Later in the crowded
dressing room, my mom and sister give me hugs and flowers. My stepfather
congratulates me on a great job. Kelly and her boyfriend are there too. My
stepfather offers to take us all out to some fancy, smancy restaurant. I’m
laughing, happy, and shaking my head yes, when I notice someone standing in the
doorway holding daisies.
Everyone stops talking
as I stare.
Kelly leans forward.
“Is that
him
?” she whispers.
I slowly nod.
“Then why are you
standing here?” She pushes me toward the door as I gulp down nerves that make
the ones on stage seem minuscule.
~11~
Somehow—I’m not entirely sure—I push
past all the other students and end up standing before Zach. Except for being
thinner, dressed casually in tan pants and a polo, he’s back to looking like
his tall, dark handsome self from those pictures. While my eyes devour him
standing there looking so healthy and gorgeous, I paste calm on my face. Inside
I’m a mess. I refuse to let myself feel hopeful. And strangely, I feel angry. I
hadn’t expected that.
He smiles and a deep
crease grooves his cheek. “Paige, right?”
After a glance at the
flowers, I raise a brow. “You did see the play, right?”
He nods as his eyes
roam over me. “It was great. You were great. It’s just surreal finally meeting
you.”
Okay, my anger melts
just a bit. He’s come to thank me for the readings. There’s no way he’d
remember me or that kiss, but he took the time to watch my play. I motion to
the flowers. “Those for me?”
“Ah, yeah,” he says,
lifting them like he forgot they were in his hand.
I take them, dramatically
sniff, and wait.
His smile weakens as I
simply stand there. “Ah, could we go somewhere quieter and talk?”
I’m not sure about
this. Do I want my heart crushed in public or private?
Since I’m not
that
good of an actor, I finally say, “Sure, follow me.”
I motion for my family
and Kelly to wait and I lead him past the theater doors to an empty hallway.
Leaning against the wall while my chest thumps in overdrive, I blink up at him
as he smiles at me. Wow, he’s so hot it’s sick. And I’m going to be sick with
desperation. Because even across from all his hotness, I’m very aware the
inside of him is even better than his gorgeous exterior.
He steps closer to me.
And a tick in his cheek has me glad I’m not the only nervous one. “I’ve wanted
to meet you since I woke up.”
I squash the hope his
words bring, but still ask, “Because?”
“Well, um…how to
explain this.” His eyes wander over my face like he’s trying to memorize it.
“Let’s just say now seeing you clearly and up close, I can’t see any guy not
noticing you. Regardless of Amanda’s D cups.”
I gasp. “You remember
me saying that?” He nods. My eyes feel like they might pop out onto the floor.
“What else do you remember?”
“Everything.”
“Everything?” I repeat
in horror. There’s just no way. I refuse to accept he remembers
everything
.
“Hey now,” he says with
a grin. “You did read my very private journal.”
“Yeah, but you were in
a coma…I was just trying to help you…Okay, I was curious…How could you hear me?”
I nearly screech as his lovely flowers in my fist bang against the wall.
He shrugs. “I guess
it’s common for coma patients to be able to hear things around them. And your
voice was like a bright light inside the darkness. There were no days just the dark.
I measured time waiting for your voice. Waiting for the girl I’d come to know
better than anyone.”
The way he’s looking at
me, the cadence of his words, and the actual words... It can’t mean what it
feels like. What I want it to mean. What has my chest now thumping like a bass
woofer.
But that ugly anger rears up. “Then why did it take
so long for you to meet me?”
He puts his hand on the wall above me and
leans forward. “I’m sorry. I could hardly speak that first week. And it took
almost two months of physical therapy to move right again.” He glances at his
left arm slightly shaking above my head. “I’m still working on some parts.”
“Oh…” Stupid me hadn’t
imagined his recovery would take so long. “Are you okay then?”
“I’m good. Ninety-nine
percent recovered. Physically great. Mentally perfect. Except,” his blue gaze
bores into mine and it becomes hard to breathe, “I need to know if you still
feel the way you did before I woke.”
I’m just as still as he
once was. Of course, he’d remember
that
.
But the biggest thing I learned from him was honesty. So I take a deep gulp of
air and tell him the truth. “Yes, yes I do.”
“In that case,” he
leans forward more until his lips almost touch mine, “I love you too, Paige.”
Just his breath across
my lips has my pulse into overdrive. When his mouth meets mine, I practically
throw myself against him. The kiss is long, deep, and wonderfully sensual, but
mostly it feels right,
like
I’m kissing the perfect
man for me. Probably because I am.
When our lips finally
part, he asks, “Let me take you out? I know it’s not next year yet, but ice
cream and cheeseburgers? To celebrate your first night. It’s the least I can do
for you bringing me back.”
I pull away to look at
him better. “My kiss really woke you?”
“You, your kiss, your
zest for life, the honesty of your emotions, your faith in me…” He tugs me back
into his arms. “Would you rather go out for sushi?”
I hug his waist while
happiness bubbles inside me. “Zach, you can take me anywhere.”
~~~~
More
books by Jean
Haus
Happily Ever After?
(Sleeping Handsome Sequel
)
~
a
novella
Full-length
Fantasy/Paranormal novels
Snow, Blood, and Envy
After Midnight
Under a Blood Moon
Coming October
2012 a YA mature contemporary romance
In
the Band
Visit her at
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Jean-Haus/227196784023975