The Billionaire's Voice (The Sinclairs #4) (10 page)

She shrugged. “I learned to adjust, to find connections in other ways. But I guess I hadn’t learned to compensate back then.”

He swiped the tear from her face with his fingers. “You’re still afraid? Why?”

Her expression was startled, and she was silent.

There was no question Tessa had healed, but her reaction to him out by the ocean the day before had been extreme. He needed to know why. She was still running away from something, but for the life of him, he wasn’t sure what or who she was afraid of.

“It’s not you. It’s me,” she finally whispered huskily. “I became so dependent on Rick when we were together that I’m afraid to ever let myself have any kind of intimate relationship again. It hasn’t really been an issue until now because I’ve never wanted to be with someone as much as I want to be with you, Micah. Not to mention you’re the first guy who has actually
wanted
me, even for a casual screw, since I lost my hearing. And I know myself. I can’t have uncomplicated sex.”

He cupped her face in his hands, his gaze glued to the vulnerable expression on her face as he growled, “Sex with you would
always
be complicated.”

He wanted to protect Tessa, shield her from any more disappointments in her life. Yet, he wanted to do so damn much more. If there was one thing he now knew for sure, it was that this woman was
his
, that he needed her to belong to
him
. Maybe subconsciously, he’d always known. But he wasn’t fighting it anymore.

His hard-on was pressing against the denim of his jeans, insisting on release, demanding that he claim what belonged to him.

Tessa’s fingers trembled as she reached up and put her hands over his that were still framing her face. “It would be terribly complicated. And risky, too.”

Micah grinned at her. “I happen to like a certain amount of risk in my life.” Maybe that’s why Tessa could cause more adrenaline to flow through his body than any sport he’d ever experienced.

“I don’t usually take risks,” she admitted. “But right now I think maybe I should. I
want
to fly, but I’m afraid of crash-landing.”

“Don’t be afraid of the fall.
I’ll
be there to catch you this time,” he told her in a hoarse voice that he barely recognized as his own. Micah desperately needed her to understand he wasn’t going anywhere. She said she’d never felt this way before, but then, neither had he. The only thing he knew for sure was that he’d never leave her alone again.

He didn’t just want her, he needed her. And he had never needed
anybody
.

She stood up so fast that her body was a blur as his hands fell to the couch, suddenly empty. She strode over to the breakfast bar that separated the small kitchen from the living room, clenching the counter tightly as she said, “I know the deal. Sex only, no strings attached. That’s the way you roll, right? But we’ll always be friends, and I think I might be able to handle that.”

Micah frowned. For him,
all
deals were negotiable with Tessa, and it wasn’t just about sex anymore. Hell yeah, he wanted to rip off her clothes and nail her hard and fast, but he wanted her
all in
. Strange . . . since he’d never been willing to do that himself.

He stood and walked over to her, pulling her petite body back against him. He wanted to groan as their bodies collided, the upper curve of her ass rubbing against his painfully erect cock. He turned her around slowly, savoring the feel of her body as she rubbed against him.

Jesus!

“I don’t know the rules anymore,” he admitted as she looked up at him. “I just know that I need to bury myself inside of you until neither one of us can think. All of this is new, different. We’d have to make up the rules as we go along.”

He pinned her against the counter as he placed his hands on the surface, pissed off at himself that he
couldn’t
just walk out the door until he got himself together. That option was completely off the table for him, even though he knew she’d probably be better off if he did.

Tessa didn’t need this.

Tessa deserved better.

Tessa needed a guy who didn’t live for an adrenaline rush.

She wrapped her arms around his neck. “Then I guess we make our own rules, because I need you right now, Micah. I can’t walk away and not experience this, experience you. It would be safer if I did, but I don’t think I can. I’d always wonder how it would have been. And I don’t want to live with regrets because I was too afraid to find out.”

He lost complete control in that moment, her own words sealing her fate. He’d make sure she never wanted to run and never regretted being with him, if it was the last thing on Earth he did.

Maybe he didn’t deserve her.

Maybe he was all wrong for her.

Maybe she did deserve someone better.

But the fact was, he couldn’t stomach thinking about another man ever touching her again.

For now, she was his, and he intended on claiming her.

The future could fucking take care of itself.

CHAPTER 9

Tessa knew she wasn’t thinking with a rational brain at the moment, but she didn’t care. As Micah swooped down to capture her mouth, she yielded completely, determined not to think about what would happen later.

She wanted this; she wanted Micah. Every cell in her body was clamoring for him to take her, and she couldn’t fight that physical and mental battle anymore. Fear of rejection had been a part of her life for so long that it was hard to let go of it, but what she’d said to him was true. If she didn’t reach out and take what she wanted, experience the things she craved, she’d be forever stuck within very limited boundaries.

I don’t always need to know what’s going to happen. I can live in the moment for once in my life without waiting for something bad to happen.

Screw contentment and safety; she wanted to live.

Her hands found their way to Micah’s hair, her breath sighing into his mouth as she raked her short nails over his scalp. When his arms snaked possessively around her body, one big hand landing possessively on her ass and the other around her back, she shivered as their bodies connected. His skin was white-hot, and all she wanted to do was let him scorch her with his fire.

His tongue thrust dominantly in her mouth in between stinging nips to her bottom lip. She moaned, wanting to get closer to him, needing to touch the blazing heat of his skin. His body was like a furnace, and she wanted to jump inside him and be consumed.

“Off,” she panted when he released her lips, her hands now tugging at the hem of his T-shirt.

Stepping back, he obliged her, whipping the garment over his head.

Oh. Sweet. Jesus.

Her heart hammered against the wall of her chest as she stared unabashedly at his defined abs, rippling biceps, and that perfect V that surrounded ripped abdominal muscles that looked like an unmovable wall.

She’d seen him naked, and he’d let her look her fill, but she didn’t remember feeling quite this overwhelmed. Maybe because she was past mortification and looking at him with unbridled lust.

Their eyes met as the shirt popped over his forehead, and Tessa’s breath caught at the purely carnal, predatory look in his hooded eyes as he dropped it on the floor. His jeans rode low on his hips, a small trail of dark hair stopping disappointingly right at the waistband, the remainder hidden beneath the denim.

Boldly, she stepped forward and flipped the metal button that was keeping her from what she wanted to see, lowering the zipper carefully without breaking eye contact with him.

“I want to see you,” she told him insistently.

“Then take what you want,” Micah answered, his eyes growing impossibly stormier.

There was something incredibly erotic about a man like Micah offering himself up to her, allowing her the freedom to do anything she wanted with him. She could sense his leashed power, and she felt like she was pulling the tiger’s tail right now, but she couldn’t stop herself from dropping to her knees and yanking at his jeans and boxer briefs. She wanted to touch him so badly that her hands shook.

Micah helped her, kicking out of the jeans and underwear until he stood in front of her completely nude. Same as before, he seemed to have no problem with being unclothed, and Tessa could see why. He didn’t have a damn thing to be shy about. The man was perfection, and the hard-on he was sporting was no small thing, standing hard and thick almost right in front of her face.

Lifting her arms, she put her hands as high as they could reach, letting her palms drift slowly down his muscular stomach, tracing that tantalizing V over and over before finally letting her touch stroke over one rock-hard ass cheek. The muscles between her thighs tightened, and she felt another flood of liquid heat dampen her panties as she fisted his hardness.

She wanted to linger, taste the bead of moisture she saw decorating the head of his cock, but Tessa found herself tugged to her feet reluctantly.

“Not now,” Micah told her as he tilted her head up. “I’d never live through it.”

She could feel his urgency, see a muscle in his jaw pulsating as he tried to rein in his desperation.

It was the hottest thing she’d ever seen.

“Get naked,” he demanded as he reached for the collar of her shirt. Despite his command, he took off her clothes himself, and he wasn’t very patient.

Tessa’s body quivered as Micah grabbed the top she was wearing and popped the buttons as he tore it down the front, pulling off what was left of the shirt before reaching for the front clasp of her bra.

The desire to feel herself skin-to-skin with him had her shucking her jeans and panties impatiently, then shrugging off the bra he’d left dangling from her arms.

Wrapping her arms around his neck, she buried her face in his neck, taking little tastes of his heated skin as she murmured, “Now.”

She felt him shake his head.

“Now,” she repeated anxiously, wrapping her legs around his waist, urging his hard erection closer to her needy core.

Supporting her ass, he walked to the counter and sat her down on the low surface. They were almost face-to-face.

Her hands never stopped moving, the feel of his body beneath her fingers so sensual that she couldn’t stop touching him. “Please.”

Desire was racing through her body, the need to have him inside her. Micah resisted even though he looked like he was ready to go caveman on her and fuck her until she screamed for mercy.

She startled when his hands cupped her breasts, his thumbs circling around the hardened nipples, playing over them until she started to whimper.

Rick had never really touched her breasts; Micah seemed to worship them.

Grasping her wrists, he put her hands on the surface behind her, her ass sitting on the edge of the counter with all of the space behind her. Tightening her legs around him, she was frustrated that the surface was too high to make contact with his cock.

Before she could register her frustration, his mouth was on her nipples, sucking one of them into his mouth, biting lightly and then soothing it with his tongue.

Heat shot through her belly, her body registering a sensation she’d never felt before. “Oh, God. Micah.” She squirmed, but he was persistent, alternating from nipple to nipple until they were diamond-hard, sensitive peaks. He bit just hard enough to make the pain pleasurable, especially when he soothed it with his wicked tongue.

Finally, just when Tessa thought she was going to lose her mind with frustrated lust, Micah pushed her back on the counter, untangled her legs from his waist, and spread her thighs. It left her feet dangling from the counter, and she opened her eyes, having forgotten at what point of pleasure she’d actually closed them.

She looked for Micah just in time to get a top view of his golden head lowering between her open thighs. Slamming her eyes closed again, her breath hitched . . . waiting. She screamed as his scorching tongue parted her folds, delving, searching relentlessly for the tiny bundle of nerves he was seeking. He found it and ruthlessly teased the hardened bud, causing Tessa to arch her back in tormented pleasure.

The sensation was intimate and decadent, and she felt herself beginning to float on a high she’d never experienced before, her body being taken over by Micah’s merciless mouth.

She speared her fingers into his hair. Begging. Pleading. Needing release with a ferocity she’d never known existed.

“Please, Micah. I can’t take any more,” she whimpered almost incoherently, but she knew he heard every sound that escaped her lips.

She was jolted from her haze of pleasure as he pulled her up just in time to see his tormented expression, then watched as he retrieved a condom from the pocket of his jeans with lightning speed and quickly rolled it on.

“Now!” She caught the word as her eyes flew to his lips. “Wrap your legs around me.”

She instantly moved her lower limbs and tangled them around his hips as he grasped the flesh of her ass tightly with his strong fingers. Taking a few steps, he pinned her body against the wall.

Tightening her arms around his neck, all she could feel was the raw, sensual, pleasurable sensation of her nipples colliding with the heat of his hard chest, the peaks so swollen that she moaned as the rest of their flesh met and melded together so tightly that she didn’t know where he ended and she began.

“Yes,” she moaned as Micah drove up into her tight, wet sheath in one hard thrust, his hands guiding her down with his grasp on her hips and ass.

He fucked her hard and fast, like a man who had been starved of carnal pleasure for a very long time. Tessa ground with his pumping motions, the strained muscles in her channel gripping him tightly every time he impaled her.

Her hands fisted in his hair, and she pulled his mouth tighter against hers as he kissed her, his tongue mimicking every thrust of his cock.

Micah’s powerful body surged harder and deeper, and Tessa knew she was about to climax hard. There had been so much teasing, and she’d been so close to orgasm when Micah had gone down on her, that she couldn’t burn much hotter without exploding into a mass of incendiary flames.

His chest was vibrating in what Tessa instinctively knew was a low groan of pleasure.

Climax rocked her body as Micah kept slamming into her over and over, sending her tumbling over the edge of the imaginary cliff she’d been standing on in a very precarious position. She soared as her orgasm shot through her entire being.

“Oh, God. Micah. Yes.” She clasped his shoulders tightly, her nails digging into his upper back. Her head dropped, her face resting against his damp neck as her muscles tightened and released over his pummeling cock.

His big body shuddered as he found his own release, and Tessa hugged him fiercely against her as he thrust one last time and the tremors stopped.

Her body was still humming with pleasure as he carried her out of the living room and into her bedroom. When he disconnected their bodies and laid her gently on the bed, she wanted to protest, but remembered he had to dispose of his condom, and they couldn’t stay joined forever.

He was back from the bathroom before she even caught her breath, and he lowered his massive body onto the mattress beside her, then circled his strong arm around her waist. He pulled until she was almost sprawled on top of him.

Her eyes shot to his mouth in time to catch his one-word comment. “Complicated.”

Then he grinned at her happily, not looking the least bit troubled by the fact that their coupling had been mind-blowing—at least for her.

Her heart lifted, and she smiled back at him, reaching up to smooth an unruly lock of his hair that always seemed to be on his forehead. Then, she nodded. “Complicated,” she agreed.

He fingered a lock of her crazy curls. “If that’s what complicated is like, I’d have no problem if it gets
really
complex.”

Tessa let out a surprised laugh. “You think you can top what just happened?” Sex with Micah was almost surreal, so she didn’t know how he could outdo what had just occurred.

He gave her a fake scowl. “That was the work of a desperate man. Sloppy. I wanted to make you come first with my mouth. I wanted to keep devouring you, Tessa. I wanted to wring every drop of pleasure I could from your body before I got inside you. I knew I wouldn’t last long.”

She covered his lips with her fingers. “Don’t. It was amazing. I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.”

He was grinning again. “Hard, fast, and up against the wall?”

“Yes.”

“Most women would complain.”

She winked at him. “I’m not complaining, stud. Most men couldn’t lift a woman up against a wall.” Tessa was serious. How many guys could really do a woman that way? It had been honest and raw. Maybe that was what made it so special.

“I couldn’t wait. That’s how bad I wanted you, Tessa. I have since the moment I saw you. I felt like a horny teenager. I wanted to bend you over the sink in the bathroom and take you right there in the guesthouse.”

She looked at him in surprise. “You did not,” she protested.

“I did. I wanted to go caveman on your beautiful ass.” His hand moved down and squeezed her rear. “I’m not used to having that kind of reaction to a woman.”

“You had a serious relationship once.” Tessa knew he’d been in one committed relationship years ago.

He nodded. “Once,” he agreed.

“Tell me,” she asked, knowing he was being deliberately vague.

“I met Anna in college, and we lived together after we finished school. She was from a wealthy family, so I pretty much knew she didn’t hook up with me because of my money. She hated my interest in skydiving and extreme sports. She kept waiting for me to settle down, but I never did. I traveled a lot, and she didn’t really want a career. I think she was ready to get married and have kids. College was just a necessary step before getting married.”

“You didn’t want to marry her?” Tessa asked curiously, realizing that trying to contain Micah would be like trying to pull a star down from the sky and stuff it into a bottle.

“I cared about her, and I thought we’d get married eventually, but I was still building my skills and my own company. We were young, and I guess I didn’t stop to consider how she felt. After a few years, she got tired of waiting and settled down with one of my friends who was content to be wealthy and eventually take control of his father’s business.”