Memo: Marry Me? (5 page)

‘In the first, you look about eighteen.’ He looked young and happy, as Lily had felt before her accident. She was still happy, she told herself, but for ever changed, just as Zach must have been by his father’s death.

But Zach hadn’t started this conversation to elicit sympathy. He had wanted to confront her mistake, to make a point about her jumping to conclusions. That was clear to her, and not entirely fair. ‘Why didn’t you say something when I —?’

‘Drew that conclusion with no help from me? By the time I realised what you thought, Dan had interrupted and I had to go.’ He reached for the photos. Their fingers touched, and he kept his grip on hers. ‘And then I wondered if it might be best to let you believe it.’

Anger gave way to something different. Something deeper. She sought the answer in his eyes, and found a wary, reluctant awareness that echoed deep inside her.

‘Yet you’ve told me. What changed your mind?’ She pulled her hand free, and hoped he couldn’t see how much she had wanted to leave it in his grasp.

‘Honesty.’ His gaze remained steadfastly on hers. ‘I don’t like deceptions.’

Deceptions such as secretaries not confessing their limitations to their boss, and planning to get out of working for him, even though he’d insisted on it? But her situation was different.

His body tensed as he studied her. ‘I couldn’t let you believe I was committed to some phantom woman. But you and I have been aware of each other, and it’s best if you know that I’m not willing to get involved with you.’

‘You don’t want a relationship?’ He had some nerve, making these assumptions, when all she had done was reciprocate his own interest. ‘What makes you think I would want to get involved, either? I don’t want
any
kind of entanglement!’

His mouth pulled into a scowling line. ‘I tried commitment once, Lily. What I had to offer wasn’t enough. I had to let it go.’

‘You’d have a lot in common with my ex-fiancé, then.’ Her words came, uncensored, straight from the hurt she’d been through. ‘It turned out he couldn’t cope with commitment, either. That experience pretty much cured me where men and relationships are concerned.’

His gaze whipped to her eyes. ‘I didn’t know you’d been engaged. Perhaps you and I have more in common than you think.’ His mouth turned down, as though his thoughts weren’t happy ones. ‘I was engaged once, too, five years ago. When my fiancée needed things from me that I couldn’t give her, we both got hurt. That experience made me accept my limitations. I can’t give a woman more than a token, fleeting interest.’

Just for a moment, Lily almost felt that his eyes asked for understanding, that she saw regret in the hazel depths.

‘There are things in my life that just make it impossible for me to give more. To have — ’ He dropped his gaze abruptly to the table top. When he lifted it again, his face was a strong mask, etched in determination. ‘I wouldn’t change anything.’

If anything, his expression became fiercer. ‘I’m not willing to find myself backed into a corner by a relationship with a woman again, that’s all!’

Well, she didn’t want those feelings, either. She didn’t welcome them any more than he did.

‘You speak as though there’s a risk we might actually get entangled.’ They shared an awareness and interest. Strong, yes, but not impossible to overcome. ‘But we’re quite safe. Neither of us wants this. We certainly don’t have to act on it.’

She forced a smile. ‘Those sparks in the air have been hanging around, it’s true, but, now we’ve talked about it, we can put it behind us and get on with a proper, uncomplicated working relationship until I leave — for as long as it’s needed.’

With a determined toss of her head, she rose. ‘Shall we go back to work?’

‘Just like that, and it’s gone and we forget it was ever there?’ He gave a humourless laugh, put the photos away and got to his feet, too.

‘Yes. Just like that.’ She hurried through the bar and out onto the street, and hoped her words would prove to be true. If they didn’t, she was in big trouble.

N
OTHING
was ever easy. Lily twisted the straps of her 1968 hand-beaded bag — Australian eBay, $2.95 plus postage — in her lap and just knew this whole thing was a big mistake. It was Friday evening, the official end of her working week. She should have been at home resting up with a favourite DVD movie. Or out with the girls, having a bit of uncomplicated fun.

She glanced at the man seated in the rear of the taxi beside her. Tonight, in evening clothes, Zach looked as though he could take on the whole world and win.

Dark trousers hugged his strong thighs. A matching jacket rested casually over the crook of one arm. The formal shirt, pristine white, pleated, and such an exact fit that it was probably custom-made, accentuated the broad chest and shoulders.

Against her will, she wanted to touch him. To feel whether his body was as firm and solid as it looked, wanted to embrace his power.

Lily should never have agreed to this. It was the baklava. Anne Swift had led her into temptation with food for the gods at that Greek restaurant right near Zach’s office building. Then, when Lily’s guard was down — and she’d been on a nice sugar buzz and had taken her first sip of the best flat black ever —
bam
, Anne had gone in for the kill.

Anne had had a persuasive way about her, but what did Lily know about families doing well-intentioned things to make each other happy? She should be focussing on not wanting Zach!

The taxi turned a corner. Her thigh bumped against his leg. She drew a sharp breath.

‘He probably hates surprises,’ she mumbled towards the window.

I do not want to say Happy Birthday and brush my lips against his cheek. I do not want to be here, at all!

But Lily had agreed to schedule and attend this ‘business meeting’ tonight as a ruse to get Zach here for the surprise his mother had taken such trouble to plan.

‘Would you please face me, not the window, if you insist on muttering? At least give me the chance to try to lip read.’ Zach’s voice rumbled with something just dark enough to facilitate a fresh batch of shivers down the length of her spine.

The same dark something she had seen when she’d emerged from their office cloakroom dressed for the evening. There hadn’t been time to go home to change. They had left straight from work, but not before he’d seared her with just the same look she was receiving now.

She cast about for some excuse for her mumbling, for some distraction from her awareness of him. Their arrival at the exclusive harbour-side address saved her.

The Opera House shimmered in the distance. Cars crawled like busy, multi-coloured ants across the harbour bridge. Boats of all shapes and sizes dotted the water.

It was beautiful, sultry, a living, breathing part of the city that couldn’t help but entice. At another time, her surroundings would have worked wonders on her mood. ‘We’re here. And right on time to see your
client
— Mr Goodman. For the
business discussions
he scheduled.’

Oh, she had worked hard to make sure she retained this name and the business-meeting ruse that went with it!

Zach wondered why Lily’s voice had been breathless, and sounded patently relieved. Not to mention her emphasising half her words as though she believed he had suddenly lost most of his comprehension skills. ‘It’s a coincidence that Vince chose this venue. I’m a part owner,’ Zach replied.

Was she relieved because they could finally quit the confines of the rear seat of the taxi? Because they wouldn’t have to be in such close proximity any longer? Was she as sensually charged with awareness of him as he was of her at this moment?

So much for her idea that they could bury their attraction to each other.

Lily nodded with what seemed to be unnecessary enthusiasm. ‘Yes, your moth — that is,
Mr Goodman
mentioned you were a part owner in the restaurant.’

‘The owner had allowed the place to lose its verve. He didn’t want to sell out, so I bought a share, helped him improve the appeal to the public.’ He didn’t care about that, only wanted to thread his fingers into her upswept hair, to touch her scalp and feel it tighten beneath his hands.

She wasn’t right for him. More to the point, he could never be right for her. The woman had a cat and some sort of egg-producing fowl, for heaven’s sake. Five years ago, he hadn’t even been able to meet Lara’s demands. And his ex-fiancée’s idea of home-making had been to take a page from
Homes of the Rich and Beautiful
and have a team of decorators apply it to her apartment.

Zach paid the driver, and helped Lily out of the taxi. Got distracted by a glimpse of long leg beneath the shimmering dress.

‘You look sensational tonight.’ He growled the words from deep within. ‘You might as well know, I want to examine every part of you. At my leisure, and preferably in private.’

‘It’s — you can’t simply up and say — ’ She sputtered to a stop, but twin flags of colour flared in her cheeks and her eyes glittered.

‘Then I’ll just look.’ He did exactly that, taking his time to examine every inch of her. The dress was a shimmering blend of autumn shades that shaped to her torso and hips, and flared just enough from knee to ankle to make movement possible, with a slit that ended mid-thigh.

High in front, a small V-dip in the back, it was perfectly respectable and rather old-worldly. But it caressed her in ways that made his hands itch to do likewise.

‘Dressed as you are, and with your hair piled up so that your neck seems smooth and endless, is it any surprise that I want to draw you back into the cab and kiss you until we both run out of breath?’

‘You have a b-business meeting,’ she stammered, and clutched her evening bag in both hands as though to shield herself from him.

Or maybe to stop those hands from doing something they shouldn’t — like reaching out to him? Their gazes clashed, and he saw the trammelled awareness in her eyes, and wanted to tell her to let it go free, to let it lead her…to him.

It was madness. But maybe it would happen, be unleashed, before either of them would be able to move beyond it.

For surely, if they gave in to this mutual interest, the results would be less than he imagined. It couldn’t possibly be all that his body and his senses told him he could find with her. ‘We need to deal with this, Lily. Because it’s pretty clear it won’t deal with itself.’

‘We can’t. We’ve already agreed neither one of us wants any type of relationship.’ She took several hasty steps away from him. ‘We need to go in now. We don’t want to keep your associate waiting.’

‘We’ll go in, but this isn’t resolved.’ He yielded for the moment, but he made no attempt to shield her from the purpose in his gaze. There
would
be a reckoning of some sort, and it would be soon. ‘I still don’t see why Goodman couldn’t have seen me during the day.’

The man was an acquaintance of his mother. He and Zach had done business before. Across a desk in broad daylight. It was Zach’s thirtieth birthday today, and, although he admitted that the sight of Lily in a clingy dress was a nice gift, he could think of things he would rather have done with his evening.

Like take Lily somewhere secluded and let nature have its way with both of them…

‘Mr Goodman must have been busy during the day, I suppose. Let’s go. It’s, er, this way, by the look of it.’ Lily gave him one short, agitated glance, then turned and hurried towards the entrance to the building.

She had freckles dotted across the milky satin of her shoulders. Freckles that seemed to invite him to lean closer, to press his lips to each little dot, to taste the freshness of soft, sweet skin.

Zach groaned, and to cover the sound broke into speech. ‘Have you been here before? You seem to know exactly where you’re going.’

His formal clothing was strangling him. The need to touch Lily was strangling him. Just a couple of short steps and he could have her in his arms.

‘I haven’t been here before, but I’ve heard the views from the restaurant floor are spectacular.’ Lily pushed the door open and stepped inside.

When they left the elevator on the top floor, the owner himself met them. He whisked them towards a set of concertina doors without giving Zach a chance to even enquire after the business.

‘It appears you’re headed for the function room.’ Zach wondered at the very obvious mistake, and at the man’s sense of suppressed urgency. ‘We’re to meet someone in the restaurant itself — ’

Without responding, the owner flung the doors open.

‘Happy Birthday!’

‘Surprise!’

The room erupted with noise and cheers.

‘I’ve been had.’ Zach turned and drew Lily to his side. A brand of ownership? A promise that their shared attraction
would
be addressed? He didn’t know, knew only that it was right for his fingers to wrap around Lily’s arm as he took in his mother’s wide smile, Daniel’s grin, and the sea of familiar faces.

Wall-to-floor panes of glass beyond them revealed the harbour in all its splendour. The magnificence of it shone for a moment in Lily’s eyes. He could drown in her. Too easily.

The restaurant owner stepped forward, grinning, and offered a hearty handshake. ‘It’s too long since you’ve visited your investment. Enjoy your night.’

Then his mother gave him a quick, one-armed hug. ‘Happy Birthday, darling. Are you utterly surprised? Vince thought it a great lark. He
does
have a business proposition to discuss, but Lily has booked an appointment.’

‘I didn’t suspect at all.’ His focus on Lily had dulled his awareness of other things. Even now, the feel of her arm beneath his fingers tantalised him.

When had his mother approached Lily about tonight? All Zach had known was Goodman’s demand for a dinner meeting. Complete with secretary to take urgent and important notes!

He turned to look at her again. The results of his hold on her carried a slow burn through his system. ‘But I think my new secretary probably has a few things to answer for.’

She dutifully laughed, but for a moment her eyes held a stark vulnerability. Why? He didn’t know, but he wanted to take that pain from her. A wave of protectiveness and possessiveness washed over him.

He didn’t consider how his actions might look to the many people who observed them. He just reached for her and accepted this had to happen. ‘I think you owe me a birthday salute, at the least, for tricking me this way.’ What harm could it do to kiss her here, in a crowded room?

She stiffened at his side. ‘Oh, no, I don’t think it would be a good idea.’

‘I do.’ He settled his mouth on hers without giving her a chance to protest further. Without giving himself time to think about it any more, either. Cupped her face in his hands, and tasted the soft fullness of her lips beneath his.

That was all he intended. A simple taste. A chance to prove this wasn’t so amazing. That he could walk away and not regret it. But she melted into him, into their kiss.

And he fell into a fathomless ocean of sensation and feeling. Her hands on his forearms, burning through the cloth of his coat. The soft, blurry fragrance of her perfume filling him as he breathed her in. Her mouth moving with his as though they’d always been together.

A feeling of such rightness and of emptiness finally being filled swept over him. He held back a gasp. It took all his will not to drag her in until their bodies melded utterly and he forgot everything. All he had proved was how right they were with each other, and he didn’t know what to do about that.

He forced his hands to relax their grip on her arms. His mouth to take one last, lingering taste, then disengage.

The silence immediately near them filled suddenly with chatter and laughter. He didn’t know if talk had actually stopped, or he just hadn’t been able to hear it while she’d been in his arms.

‘You shouldn’t have done that.’ She whispered the reprimand. Her flushed face revealed the same shock he felt.

The slight puffiness of lips well kissed wrenched a gasp from deep inside him — he held it back, but could do nothing about the gaze that caressed her from head to toe.

‘Happy Birthday, Zach.’ She pinned on a tremulous smile that might have been meant to convince onlookers that the kiss had been a casual salutation.

Would they believe her? Or would they perceive the depths of the exchange in the same way he had experienced those depths just now?

Lily took a shaky step away from Zach, then another. ‘I hope you enjoy your…celebration.’

All Lily wanted to do was to back away and keep on going. Her heart pounded, her hands shook.

Zach had kissed her in front of a room full of people. Had touched her and drawn a response she’d thought had died the day Richard Pearce had abandoned her to a hospital ward, and a future he no longer wanted to share.

No. That wasn’t right. She had
never
felt this way. Not with Richard. Not with any man. Did the people around them know it? Could they see Zach had unlocked something inside of her that could carry her away? Make her ignore everything that mattered?

Anne Swift caught her hand in hers and gave it a squeeze. ‘Thank you so much for your help. I couldn’t have pulled this off without you.’

Her friendliness and the absence of any kind of surprise or dismay gave Lily hope that the kiss
hadn’t
revealed as much to others as she had thought it might have.

Anne turned slightly to include someone standing at her side. ‘You’ve met my second son, I think?’

‘Yes.’ Lily offered the boy a smile. She hoped it looked genuine, because she regretted her impulsive thoughts the last time she’d seen him. ‘Daniel and I met at the office.’

‘And how are you enjoying the job?’ Anne asked. ‘Was it difficult to come in part-way through and take over from, oh, what was her name?’ She laughed, and waved a dismissing hand. ‘My memory isn’t what it used to be.’

Lily bit down on a half-hysterical laugh.
Tell me about it!

‘Her name was Rochelle.’ Lily tried not to go sour-faced at the name. ‘And I’m only filling in for a short time at your son’s office.’