The Summer of Our Discontent (9 page)

“Shut up.” Faith ended the call, glad that she’d had the foresight to bring disinfectant. She planned to spray all the shower stalls to kill any lanky leprechaun germs that may’ve lurked.

*******

Later, she tossed and turned on the sliver of mattress in her cabin. The overwhelming sound of crickets and cicadas was not comforting but annoying. How anyone thought a trillion bugs surrounding them was charming was beyond her. The few times she did begin to doze off, a burst of giggles would come from the girls’ cabins nearby. If that wasn’t enough, there was a light coming from Rachel’s cabin that illuminated the ceiling just above her bed. And Rachel had sneezed at least ten times already, a problem that could be corrected if only Rachel would allow her to put a pillow over her face and hold it there for like an hour.

She was happy that Sophie was having such a wonderful time, but she would’ve taken a thousand bitch slaps to have avoided the trip. The heat and humidity was cloying, the food bland and fattening. Bugs the size of minivans flew around, and there was a really big one in the cabin next to her. Faith knew it had the ability to sting; she’d been stung many times before.

Earlier that evening, she could feel evil green eyes on her when she sat at the fire with the kids. The few times she glanced Rachel’s way, she caught her cold stare. She was fairly certain that if Rachel could’ve put her on a stick, she would’ve roasted her like a marshmallow.

Rachel sneezed again, and this time, Faith said, “Curse you.”

“Shut up.”

She sat up, peered into Rachel’s cabin, and could just see the top of the book Rachel was holding. “What’re you reading?”

“How to dispose of a body in a campground.”

“Can I read it when you’re done?”

“No,” Rachel said with a sniff. “I need it to refer to. How tall are you?”

“A fraction of an inch shorter than you but far more powerful. While you’re hoisting doughnuts, I’m working a real job.”

“Yes, playing horseshoes at the station and stuffing your face with biscuits must be so exhausting.”

Faith tossed her sheet aside. “That sounded like another barb. That’s not the civility you’ve been preaching.”

“How much do you weigh? I need to factor that into my formula.”

“You figure it out.” Faith got up and opened the door to her bathroom. Either the person who designed it was rail thin or had a wicked sense of humor. She looked up at the rusted spring above her head that would assure the door remained closed and held it with her foot as she tried to back in toward the toilet. The door slammed on her head, pushing her backward and down onto the commode before she’d even gotten her shorts down. She pushed it open with her foot and tried to shimmy out of her shorts only to have it slam on her knees. In the privacy of her bathroom, Faith released a long litany of profanity.

“‘Son of an ass-licking bitch dog,’ I am certain, falls into the category of prohibited language,” Rachel whispered loudly as Faith emerged from the bathroom and climbed into bed.

“I can say whatever I want when pissing with my knees under my chin. Don’t listen next time.”

“It was kind of hard to avoid. You scared the owls out of the trees above.” Rachel’s light went off, and it became very dark. “What’d you do about the cockroaches?”

“What roaches?”

“The giant ones that live in the pine bark and like to keep you company in the chill of the night.”

“You can’t make me any more miserable than I already am.”

“Oh, yeah? Turn on your flashlight and aim it at the ceiling.”

“Mother of
frickin
’ pearl!” Faith was out of the bed and cabin in half a second.

“Would you two shut up?” one of the other chaperones yelled out.

Rachel’s door swung open, and Faith shined a light all over her cabin. “Why don’t you have them?” she whispered and shined it in Rachel’s eyes.

“Get that light out of my face or you won’t need one the next time you go to the bathroom. I’ll shove it so far up your—”

“Potty mouth, explain why you don’t have cockhorse bugs in your cabin.”

Rachel shielded her eyes. “You obviously smell better to them.”

Faith’s light moved all around the cabin until it stopped on a can of bug killer by the door. “I’m taking this. It’s either that or we’re gonna be sharing that wafer of a mattress you’re lying on. And, baby, I kick like a donkey.”

“Smell like one, too,” Rachel whispered as Faith walked out. She lay there with a grin on her face knowing what was coming next. The first blast of that spray would draw all the roaches out of their hiding places. Faith’s yelp was confirmation that she had many unwanted roommates. Rachel sighed contentedly. “Good night, asshole.”

Chapter Twelve

Faith awoke with dew on her face and the smell of bug repellent on her skin. She’d sprayed herself so thoroughly before she spread her sheets out on the picnic table that she could actually taste it. She’d fought the good fight, but when a cockroach the size of a bird flew at her face, she retreated from the cabin. Her back ached from sleeping on the hard wood of the table. But what kept her warm in the chill of the night beneath a damp sheet was the white-hot anger she felt for Rachel. The veteran campers were supposed to take the newbies under their wings. Rachel would’ve probably skewered her with a talon, but she still could’ve warned her about the bugs. Rachel demanded civility, but she was dishing the shit. Perhaps that was something best served early—in bed.

*******

The slamming of a door awoke Rachel. Bleary-eyed, she sat up, and her bladder began to complain. With a yawn, she threw her sheet aside and put her feet on the floor. Something didn’t feel right. She jerked her foot up, and in the gray light of dawn, she noted the word spelled out in dead roach carcasses.
Ass
. One of the S’s was malformed because she’d stepped on it. “I’ll show you ass,” Rachel said lowly between clenched teeth.

Faith wasn’t in her cabin, and the mess hall wasn’t open yet, so that meant she could only be one place. Rachel charged into the bathhouse and heard water running in one of the showers. She’d already planned for this eventuality and brought along a cup, which she filled with cold water. Without looking, she jerked the curtain back and threw its contents on the unlucky bather. It wasn’t Faith’s scream that met her ears because Rachel knew that well.

“Chauvin! What the hell?”

The cup fell from Rachel’s limp fingers. “Keely?”

The water shut off, and a hand protruded from behind the curtain and grabbed a towel. Seconds later, Keely ripped open the curtain and stormed out. “We’ve never played pranks on each other, so I can only assume you thought I was Leblanc,” she said, dripping all over Rachel as they stood toe to toe.

“I…uh…she put roaches in my cabin.”

“What’re you—six?” Keely bellowed. “You could’ve given me a fucking heart attack just now.” She inhaled sharply. “I have violated my own profanity rule twice, and you’ve been at the scene of the crime both times, Rachel Chauvin!”

“Can you…would you…brush your teeth before you continue this butt chewing?” Rachel said, taking a step back. Bad suggestion, she knew, but it was out there, and Keely puffed up like a dead possum on hot asphalt. “You find Leblanc! I want you both in my office in thirty minutes.”

“Will do.” Rachel turned and ran out of the bathhouse. In the distance, she could see Faith jogging one of the trails near the lake. She walked out to meet her, and by the time she got to the water, Faith was standing on the pier, arms over her head breathing deeply.

“Keely wants to see us both in her office in twenty-five minutes.”

Faith turned and looked at her. “For what?”

“I just doused her with cold water in the bathroom because I thought she was you.”

“So what does that have to do with me?” Faith asked nonchalantly.

“You put roaches in my cabin.”

“You lucked out because had your mouth been open, I would’ve loaded it up,” Faith shot back, and Rachel’s lips disappeared as she clenched her fists. Faith pushed a little harder. “Don’t blame me for accosting Keely in the shower. Is that how you get your action these days? Rumor has it since
Cyn
dumped you, the only person that’s touched that spot between your legs was Lottie Bishop, and that was with the heel of her shoe. Oh, are we mad, Ms. Civil?”

Faith took a step back when Rachel took one toward her. She’d found Rachel’s magic button and not the one that brought on intense pleasure. The button Faith was relentlessly pushing caused waves of anger to course through Rachel’s veins.

“Chauvin…are you about to put your hands on me?”

“Just your neck,” Rachel said with a growl as she took another step forward.

Faith’s head sank down between her shoulders as she held up two fingers. “As they say, mess with the bull, you get the horns.”

“They also say why buy the whole pig when all you want is a little sausage.”

Faith looked positively flummoxed. “What does that mean?”

“I have no idea, I’m so pissed I can’t think,” Rachel said as she charged.

“Assault—newbie—under your wing” was all Faith could get out before they hit the water.

*******

“Look at you two! Dripping wet, soaking my rug and my chairs. I have dealt with squabbling kids of all ages, but never, and I mean never, have I had to call in two women who are nearly forty years old.” Fire was in
Keely’s
eyes as she stood behind her desk with her arms folded. “When I saw both of your names on the roster, I knew I was in for trouble, but then I thought, ‘Hey, they’re adults.’ I was so wrong,” she said with a scowl. “I have a camp full of impressionable girls, two of whom are related to y’all. Did you consider what type of an example you’d be setting? A police officer and a fireman—”

“Firefighter,” Faith said, then cleared her throat. “Sorry, go on.”

Keely slowly sat down, glaring at them, then her expression turned curious. “All through school, you two were always going at it. Why?”

Neither readily answered, then Rachel shrugged. “We just never got along.”

“There’s a reason, I wanna hear it,” Keely persisted.

“She was a tool,” Faith said, unwilling to look at Rachel. “Still a tool, a great big ugly tool!”

“You weren’t a saint, either. You teased me relentlessly.”

Faith whirled around. “I gave what I got.”

“So…this is it? As children, you picked on each other, and neither of you can let that go? You two can’t look back on it and chalk it up to an experience in your youth?”

“She ticketed me for parking in front of a fire hydrant.”

“Because you did,” Rachel shot back. “You weren’t on duty. You were just going in to get a sandwich.”

“I work for the fire department!”

“Shut up,” Keely said loudly. “Are y’all insane? I’m really wondering if you two should be around children at all.”

“I’ve never given you any problems,” Rachel protested.

“Until today,” Keely countered calmly. “Here’s the deal. There are no three strikes. The next time you two tie into it, you’re outta here. You’ll have to explain to your children why you have to leave, and I don’t think either of you want to be in that position. Kaycee and Sophie are having a wonderful time. Think about that.”

Rachel sank lower into the chair. Her wet ass squeaked against the plastic, adding to her humiliation. “I…have behaved badly. I let my temper get away from me, and I should’ve never pushed you into the lake, Faith. I apologize to you and to you, Keely.”